I have a long history of alcoholism and drunkenness (whatever the difference is) in my family. 3 of my grandparents have been drunks. My parents both drank heavily in their younger years, but quit mainly due to God's grace. My brothers are both alcoholics, as are various aunts and uncles.
In addition, I had open heart surgery when I was 19, and the doctor told me that that can screw up your brain and make you manic-depressive, so he warned me against addictino.
I've always been repulsed by alcohol, anyway, and have done my best to resist it.
The only offiical "drink" I've ever had was when I got engaged. That one drink, combined with the emotion of the evening, made me quite giddy and uninhibited.
This past Christmas, my wife's sister-in-law served a delicious cheesecake that had rum or somethign in it, and two pieces of that left me feeling quite "high" the rest of the day. I coudl definitely tell the difference.
And now that I've had those two experiences (the second to confirm the way I felt with the first), whenver I'm depressed, I find myself wanting a drink. Sometimes, the sheer expense of alcohol is the only thing that keeps me from drinking.
The pull is amazing. I just want to get that feeling. . . .
I guess I am blessed in that I'm pretty good at fighting the temptations.
I have oxycodone in the cabinet, but really only use it when I need it for pain.
I have always battled the temtpation to suicide, and can overcome that with fear of hell.
I have never felt *tempted* by alcohol until recently. . . .
I guess my question is, is there any way to fight the temptations themselves?
Is there any way to keep myself from *feeling* the desire to drink/get high?
Thanks in advance,
JC
In addition, I had open heart surgery when I was 19, and the doctor told me that that can screw up your brain and make you manic-depressive, so he warned me against addictino.
I've always been repulsed by alcohol, anyway, and have done my best to resist it.
The only offiical "drink" I've ever had was when I got engaged. That one drink, combined with the emotion of the evening, made me quite giddy and uninhibited.
This past Christmas, my wife's sister-in-law served a delicious cheesecake that had rum or somethign in it, and two pieces of that left me feeling quite "high" the rest of the day. I coudl definitely tell the difference.
And now that I've had those two experiences (the second to confirm the way I felt with the first), whenver I'm depressed, I find myself wanting a drink. Sometimes, the sheer expense of alcohol is the only thing that keeps me from drinking.
The pull is amazing. I just want to get that feeling. . . .
I guess I am blessed in that I'm pretty good at fighting the temptations.
I have oxycodone in the cabinet, but really only use it when I need it for pain.
I have always battled the temtpation to suicide, and can overcome that with fear of hell.
I have never felt *tempted* by alcohol until recently. . . .
I guess my question is, is there any way to fight the temptations themselves?
Is there any way to keep myself from *feeling* the desire to drink/get high?
Thanks in advance,
JC
